Belt-tightening tale to fill the pockets

Is Peter Mayes of Petersham (C8) the only person stuck at home in Sydney who has lost weight? Wendy Crews of Lane Cove North reckons the most astounding part “of Peter Mayes’ click-and-collect belt was that he’s lost weight during lockdown. There’s a best-selling book to be published, Peter.” Joy Allen of Five Dock hopefully offers: “surely he could share his weight loss secret/s rather than his belt-tightening?”

“Alan Gibson need not worry that the light at the end of the tunnel (C8) is a train rushing towards him as none of the trains purchased by Transport Minister Andrew Constance can fit in any of our tunnels,” is the wry comment of John Bailey of Canterbury.

Murray Hutton of Mount Colah offers four points of perspective. “A pessimist sees a never-ending dark tunnel. An optimist sees a light at the end of the tunnel (C8). A pragmatist sees a train coming towards them. The train driver sees three idiots standing on the tracks.”

You want it darker? Lance Millar of Tweed Heads obliges. “My vague suspicion remains that light at the end of the tunnel (C8) may turn out to be the dull gleam on the edge of the abyss.” Leonard Cohen would be proud.

There are car hire companies that are actually made for Australian roads (C8). Judith Hadley of Surry Hills hired a Brits Campervan to tour the outback in the 1990s and found out the hard way that about how bad the road going into the Bungle Bungles was when “the roo bar fell off. The only surprise the rental car company experienced was discovering that we had hauled it in and out of the campervan every day so we could return it to them.”

And there are those that aren’t. Some years ago, Peter Wotton of Pyrmont joined six other families for a month-long trek through central Australia, including the Simpson Desert. “As three families did not own 4WD vehicles, these were hired from a Sydney hire car company. It was only after signing the contracts that we were advised that we could not take them off-road. It was only after some serious discussion that we were allowed to take vehicles designed for rough roads off the bitumen.”

Alan Robertson of Campbell (ACT) is perplexed by ACT Health’s instruction “for residents in quarantine to have a COVID test between Day 12 and Day 13”.

Column8@smh.com.au
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