Brentford v Arsenal: Premier League – live!

82 min: Arsenal sub: off goes Chambers, the 26-year-old veteran from another time, on comes Nuno Tavares, insert More Than A Woman/It Only Takes A Minute gag here.

80 min: It’s almost three as Canos whips the ball in from the left, Leno flaps and Norgaard just fails to get to it. Arsenal shambolic.

Brentford made a sub. Off went the new boy Onyeka, on came Mads Bidstrup, making it two Mads in one Premier League team, with Sorensen also on. Insert gag here.

79 min: Thomas Stratford requires a saucer of milk: “Long throw into the box by the men in red and white stripes then bullied over the line. Tony Pulis’ Stoke would be proud.”

78 min: Pepe wallops the ball out of the ground, somewhere towards the intersection with the M3. He is jeered and lampooned.

76 min: Arsenal desperate now. Saka offers hope, as does Smith Rowe. The rest, not so much. “As it stands I think Arsenal go from top of the table to bottom of the table after one game,” says Thomas Plunkett. “Not to jinx it.”

74 min: By the way, it was such a Brentford goal to score. That was worked out on the training ground below the Heathrow flightpath. Pinnock took the long throw before, but Sorensen took this one, and launched a garryowen Arsenal could not deal with. £50m Ben White was one of the guilty parties.

Sorensen launches a throw from the sideline, Pinnock causes trouble, the ball is allowed to bounce and Norgaard nods in. That was such an Arsenal goal to concede.

72 min: Vibesmaster Thomas Frank revs up the home crowd, conducting them rather in the style of André Rieu, and not a dissimilar tonsorial arrangement.

71 min: Both teams make changes; off goes Ajer for Sorensen for Brentford. On comes Reiss Nelson for Martinelli for Arsenal.

70 min: Pinnock wallops clear after Saka plays an early cross. Arsenal pushing on, and Chambers gets to the byline and serves up Xhaka a chance to shoot. He misses and is cross with himself.

68 min: End to end, and Tierney is perhaps too honest when an Ajer challenge thunders in and he steps away rather than rides it. That could have been a penalty except there was no contact at all.

66 min: Canos has another shot after a sweeping move from Brentford follows some panicked clearing of the lines in defence. Then Mbeumo shoots on goal, only to be pulled back when Janelt is caught offside.

64 min: Ben White does well when pressed in his own box, and then Saka comes away. It’s Tierney, essentially playing as a left winger tonight, who shoots with his right. The resultant corner almost supplies a goal, as Martinelli flicks beyond Toney.

63 min: Now it’s Pablo Mari’s turn to go down hurt after a whack to the chops. There hasn’t been much football played in the last few minutes. Has that killed Arsenal’s momentum.

61 min: A delay in play as Ajer hurts himself in challenging fellow ex-Celtic man Tierney. Ajer is a tad ginger in his movements after he comes back on.

58 min: Brentford being put through their defensive paces, and now Saka comes on, to some boos, and then a standing ovation, as he replaces Balogun, who did not have an easy night. He got 13 touches on the last readout. And didn’t get many more after that.

56 min: Tierney is again the threat but his ball is looped too far. Then Smith Rowe just fails to get to the ball. Tierney and Smith Rowe are the way back into this match for Arsenal, as will be Saka, who is set to come on any minute.

54 min: Toney is down, having been baulked with Xhaka, and he looks to be struggling with his knee. There is a break in play. Bukayo Saka can be seen on the sidelines, and may soon be making an appearance.

52 min: Pepe just fails to play in Martinelli. This has been far better from Arsenal. Much better.

51 min: Arsenal in the ascendancy, and it looks as if Brentford will have to ride out the storm for the moment. Smith Rowe looks the most likely, cutting through the middle with a neat turn, and he can only scoop his shot at Raya. Better from the away team.

49 min: Lokonga makes a languid run and again the ball goes out to Tierney, then to the opposite flank to Pepe, then Toney wins a free-kick as he runs back to defend. It’s a team effort from Brentford.

48 min: The home crowd’s dander is up, as Arsenal start with some verve. Again, it’s Tierney on the left who is the most dangerous attacker, and his cross is saved by Raya.

46 min: Back away we go with Sergi Canos, the goalscorer leading Brentford back out. Long throw from Pinnock coming up, though it’s not quite a Dave Challinor or Rory Delap and is cleared.

The interactions are in.

Kári Tulinius: “I can’t speak for other Arsenal fans, nor fans of the other “Super League clubs”, but I still haven’t gotten over that episode of capitalist malarkey. Will I? Probably, I’m a football fan, and it’s hard to cut those emotional ties. But I feel less invested this August than I have for a long time.”

Gary Byrne: “Early doors at the Community Stadium, but the Arsenal kit man is already having a ‘mare.”

Charles Antaki: “I counted about four episodes of promising Arsenal play in that half, but they were each only about 5 seconds long. The dismal periods were all the rest of the 46 minutes.”

Mary Waltz: “London has a large vocabulary of swear words to choose from. There is a segment of red shirted North Londoners who are currently adding Kronke and Arteta to the canon.”

Zach Neeley: “Experience up front showing for Brentford.”

The home team, the arrivistes fully deserve their lead. They have been energetic and enterprising, the opposite of Arsenal, in fact. A lovely goal from Canos seized the agenda and Brentford have pushed on more. For this 45 minutes, they have been a credit to the Premier League.

45+1 min: Just a minute added on, and Brentford try to see it out. They do so with some heroic defending from Ethan Pinnock. That’s it for the half.

44 min: Toney holds the ball up, and then gets it back, and Janelt just fails to get to the ball. The young German had surged forward. Brentford full of ideas, Arsenal far less so.

42 min: Mikel Arteta sets to work on the sidelines. He’s had to pick a scratch team and the results have not been promising so far.

40 min: Henry whips the ball in and it is cleared hurriedly away from the Arsenal box. There’s been a lot of that sort of thing. Thomas Frank, his haircut that of an ageing member of Chapterhouse who didn’t lose his hair, is working away with his assistants on the bench. He is almost as frantic as his team.

38 min: Jeers as Balogun, who doesn’t lack for ambition, smashes one into the stands.

37 min: Pablo Mari is trending on Twitter. Don’t imagine for a second that’s a good sign for him. Another Brentford press sneaks the ball out, and Xhaka loses it, and then he is lucky when a Mbeumo flick doesn’t come off. Brentford are…good to watch.

35 min: It hasn’t been an easy start for £50m Ben White. He and the rest of the Arsenal defenders have not been able to settle at all with Brentford pushing right up to Bernd Leno’s goal line.

33 min: Brentford fans already doing the olé thing as their striped heroes pass the ball around. Then they jeer when Pepe cuts in from the right to try a shot with his left foot.

31 min: Balogun in a dangerous position after a pass by Tierney, who has been Arsenal’s prime attacker, but just as the young American was going to shoot, the ball was whipped from him.

30 min: Close again! Mbeumo finds space, weaves and then slashes a shot wide. Arsenal have not, it has to be said, defended well.

28 min: There is a minute’s applause for Rob Rowan, one of the men behind the Brentford project, who died three years ago.

27 min: So shocked by the goal on both teams that there has barely been any football in the last five minutes. There are some crossed arms in the Arsenal end. Not this again…

25 min: Calum Chambers was signed the same summer Arsenal signed Debuchy, Welbeck, Ospina and the other Gabriel. There is a question over whether the ball had gone out. But Leno was beaten down low at his near post. Poor Leno to recycle my own gag from the other day.

23 min: So much for Arsenal gaining control. There was panic there, and Calum Chambers – still at the club, you know – ended up clearing it straight to Canos, who was calm. Well well.

Toney causes problems, Xhaka sweeps up as Mbeumo is denied but it comes out to Canos, who steadies himself and scores past Leno. Wow!

21 min: Brentford corner, all ten players up for it, five in the box, five outside. All part Tom Frank’s plan but then Mari heads away well.