The internet has slammed a bride for asking her cousin to work for free when they can’t go to the wedding.
Published on Reddit‘s r/AmITheA**hole forum, a family member under an anonymous username shared their story to get feedback from the “AITA” community. The viral post has over 7,000 upvotes and 900 comments.
The original poster (OP) began their story by explaining how they and their wife own a printing business. Their wife’s cousin was a bride-to-be and wanted them to print guest books, life-size cutouts, banners and more. Since she was family, the OP decided not to charge her as they were happy to help.
In the weeks leading up to the wedding, the bride’s wedding planner spoke to them about when they needed the items. However, the OP and their wife had very little detail on when the wedding was as they hadn’t received their invitation.
Turns out, the bride told the OP’s wife that they “downsized” the wedding and unfortunately, they were cut from the guest list as it was strictly close family and friends.
The OP and his wife were “hurt and insulted” when they got the news.
“We’ve spent close to $2000 on all the materials. Her cousin and the wedding planner kept making tiny revisions to the artwork, had us print samples to see how it would look in person, resized several of the items a few times, etc. All that cost a ton of time and money. And we’re a functioning business, so we either had to delay other orders or stay late and print her stuff on our own time,” the OP said.
“I went ahead and billed her for our cost and said we needed payment before delivery because I’m not going to chase her for payment for months/years after the wedding. We’re not making money on it, just charged her for the cost of materials. So far we’ve gotten threatening calls from the cousin, her fiance, some random members of my wife’s family that I don’t know, some of the groomsmen, etc essentially calling us a**holes. After the harassment, I’m considering charging full price or else we won’t deliver the items,” they concluded.
Newsweek reached out to the OP for comment.
Newsweek has published several articles regarding weddings including how a woman was backed for “upstaging” a bride at her wedding, a bridal store backed for forcing a woman to sign $489 waiver or lose weight and a bride that showed off her “dream wedding dress” to mixed reactions online.
How to downsize your wedding guest list
There are many people that you want to invite to your wedding, but when does it get “too much?” Have you created your guest list and want to downsize? Brides magazine has tips on downsizing your guest list:
- If possible, make your wedding adults only.
- Don’t allow any plus ones.
- Have some guests attend the wedding virtually.
Many people prefer to have smaller weddings to make them feel more intimate, these weddings typically have between 15 to 75 guests.
U/Braign received the top comment of over 14,000 upvotes, “‘Sorry, we had to downsize the discount to cover close friends and family only’ [Not the a**hole].”
“[Not the a**hole]. Tell her it’s only free for ‘close friends and family’. Because she has established you don’t fall into this category, distant family pays materials costs (or full if you choose to charge that),” u/poweller65 said.
“[Not the a**hole]. Tell them if they keep the threats they won’t be getting any of the materials either. If they don’t consider you close enough to be at the wedding, then you are not close enough to give them your work for free. What a bridezilla,” u/RandomlyDi wrote.
“[Not the a**hole] The audacity of these people! I’m confident they never planned to invite you to the wedding and just wanted free stuff. Don’t let them get away with it. Although, it is a shame you only charged them for cost, still feels like they’re getting away with something. Please be sure to tell your family that’s messaging you what REALLY happened, because those people absolutely are telling them a very different version of events. I’m certain they’re leaving out essential details,” u/Tricky-Flamingo-7491 commented.