Your mask will be the making of you

Barry Riley writes from his shoebox in the middle of the road in Woy Woy: “After regaling my grandkids with tales of how much tougher it was in my childhood, I told them that one day they’ll be telling their grandkids the same thing: ‘We survived the dreaded COVID pandemic of the 2020s. Yeah, it was tough. We had to wear masks.’”

Speaking of tough: “In the late ’60s, my father killed one of my false eyelashes (C8) by beating it to pieces with his slipper,” says Susan Osborne of Miranda. “I used to stick them on the side of the hand basin for storage.”

Garry Thomas of Oatlands presents the latest small world saga (C8) from his time in the employ of the Queens Head at Hammersmith in London. “An Australian walked in looking for a drink, and we went through the usual questions. When he asked where I lived, I said I doubt he knew the suburb, but I told him I lived at Denistone East. He knew where Denistone East was and asked the street. I told him it was Gallard Street, but when he asked the number, he was confused as to where it was. After several attempts, we gave up, and I proceeded to tell him about my dog, a golden retriever. His face lit up, and he inquired: ‘You own Ben?’ How many thousands of kilometres around the world, he didn’t know my house, but he knew my dog? I must admit Ben would sit in the local butcher’s doorway and, being so big, nobody could get in or out until he got his bone. One smart dog. And fairly well known.”

“The world is even smaller than we think,” reckons Peter Riley of Penrith. “According to the six degrees of separation theory, all Column 8 readers know each other by not more than six links; i.e. you are one link away from everyone you know, two links away from everyone they know, and so on. Kind of explains why COVID has a certain inevitability.”

Testing patience. Les Reedman of Cooranbong notes that when a couple were asked where they live, they replied: “We live in a carpark in Sydney.”

“Thank you, Granny, for reminding me each morning to take my mask with me when leaving home. As one white-haired woman to another, it’s wonderful to have helpful friends,” says Patricia Mindt of Wahroonga.

Column8@smh.com.au

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